Wednesday, December 31

Resolutions, anyone?

Oh, how I do NOT think I am perfect in any way.
But change?....I don't know about that.
I checked back to my blog post of a year ago to see
if I had written anything about making resolutions for the
incoming 2008 -
and that would be a big negative.

Thinking back though I have made some changes in '08.

I did join a gym in the prospects of getting healthy.
And except for the last three weeks of this year,
I went at least 5 days a week unless I was sick.
Not bad. Is my a$$ still as large as it was when I started?
But hey. One baby step at a time here. Now that I know I can be
committed to staying healthy by working out,
maybe this year, I'll stop topping off the gas tank,
when I'm not even a 1/4 of a tank low.
Or in the words of one of my favorite (sometimes explicit)
blog - Queen of Shake Shake,
stop eating like a f#$%ing a$$hole.

Albeit towards the end of the year,
I did make it a point to keep the earth a little healthier.
Reusable bags, recycling...
I have tried to bring interest to the kids -
we try to watch a lot of shows
and read about helping our earth.

Wow - that's a short list.

Things I didn't change this past year would include

still not shutting my mouth when I feel something needs to be said.
I'd have to say - that's a hard one to change. Not sure if that is
ever going to happen. I react on emotion and passion and for my
undying need to keep everything real and right (Right According To Gini).
Not always right to everyone else, but right to me, just the same.
At 43 though, those that know me, know that is completely me,
but on this list just because.

Carrying on,
there's been no change in
the amount of stress I probably bestow on myself regarding:
the untidiness of my house on most days,
the financial situation of this world and how it is/will be
affecting my family and our future,
the ever expanding size of my waistline,
(hey, didn't I just mention that in the last paragraph?),
my increased decline of organization in our daily life
due to the increased incline of activity...,

But all this stress has allowed me to:
concentrate on my family.
My husband and my children.

I think I have been a strong but sometimes opinionated
support system for my husband regarding his wants and
desires for his future and the future of this family.
I have tried to be a good listener and love that I am
part and parcel of his decision making.

Unfortunately, most time,
the attention leans a lot more towards
the children (sorry, Bill).

I have had more time to dedicate to making sure Garrin
grows into a wonderfully smart young boy, by fighting for our
rights for special education for speech. It's a fight I've fought before,
and know that the end results are worth all the time I spend
with the School District and Special Education people.

I've had more time to get more indepthly (is that a word?)
involved in my kids swim team. This is a commitment that both
of our kids have willingly made on their own - so whatever support
I can give them, I have been willing to do. In the interim, I have met a lot
of great people within the sport of competitive swimming, I have learned
a lot and feel really good about giving my time, love and support back
to, not just my own kids, but all of the kids on the team.

I have spent many long thoughtful moments, learning to cut the apron
strings with my daughter, who is becoming an even more independent young
girl, way faster than I ever intended!

My time has also allowed for more one on one with my son - who is living
the stereotypical middle child's life. It has been more in the forefront of
my mind, that I need to make a conscious effort to make him feel
special, loved and sometimes like he is the only object of my affection.
I am far from accomplishing all I want to as far as Connor goes,
but hey, that's what 2009 is for, isn't it??

Speaking of.
My thoughts so far.

I'm going to put this right out there. I miss my friend MaryBeth,
more than I ever thought I could miss a friend. I will make it a point in
one way or another to make our now - long distance - friendship, a priority.
It is not often you find a friend, poured from your same mold,
and what we had in each other on a daily basis, has diminished with the miles
between us now.

My family. Well, everyone is now ALL back on the East Coast, and
the five of us are going to make a concerted effort in visiting. We are
officially done with the excuse that Vegas is a fabulous place to visit -
so y'all should just come here.
Even one trip back a year is a good thing. with 5 people...
3 of them kids....
just kidding. My kids love to fly and we look forward to
doing this.

The rest of the extended family -
well, hello FaceBook. (which I hate by the way)
but it is a good thing. It gives me the opportunity to keep tabs
on my cousins and their kids, chat with them every once in a while,
(that online chat thing is fantastic....!). While I may not have
the opportunity to visit them or be a part of their lives,
keeping tabs works for me. I've come to know,
we all go our separate ways and life carries on. I love them
no less. The point is I need to make more time for the
ones that are a part of my life.

And here's another good one.
I need to let stupid shit stop bothering me so much.
I waste a lot of energy on crap like that. I think my sister told me
this once. "Things that don't impact your life on a daily basis, should
not be something you let 'get' to you." I might have to give that a shot.
I guess this all means that my house may NEVER be as clean as I'd like
it to be. oh well.

So farewell 2008.

I am truly thankful for Bill.
Though I don't show him enough,
I love him with all my being. Without him, my life would
not be full.

I am thankful that I have been given the gift of
my three kids. As much as I make it my life's dedication
to teach them to become honorable, trustworthy and loving
adults, they teach me things on a daily basis. They teach me
that I can always do better, love better, see better.

My friends. wow. All of my friends.
Jer - I have loved nothing more than getting our friendship
back to a better place. My life is better for it - I know. I love you
because you love me for me. You are my sounding board
and my support. Thank you.
Yo - I have enjoyed nothing more than getting to know you
inside and out. I love who you are and what you stand for. You are
funny and real and couldn't imagine my days without you.

And a shout out to all my other peeps.
Love you guys. Love you for letting me bring everyone
to party numerous times throughout the year!!! ha ha
If this big house is good for one thing and one thing only -
big enough to hold all of our friends!
cleaning it is my nemesis......

that was a long post.

Bill - this may mean
that though my intentions are good,
the laundry may still be piling high,
the house may be in disarray,
dinner may not be planned,
I will always try to be the best that I can be
which can only benefit you in the end.
(wink, wink)


Denise said...

Gini: This blog post is wonderful and I love you for keepin it real! I am excited to hear about a Herbst annual visit back East! I miss you guys.

Kim said...

I think in 2009 you should resolve to cut yourself some slack - you are a great wife, mother sister and friend, and we wouldn't have you any other way. Well, except 3,000 miles closer!

Kim said...

Shoot, I hate it when I screw up my punctuation when I post!

Anonymous said...

Gini.. Thanks for keeping it REAL!! In closing 2008, a year full of change, struggle and despair.. A year in which we heard stories of lost jobs, homes and friends.. a year that we ALL found ourselves wondering what happened and could we keep going forward.. We should all remember the most important thing, the most valuable asset we have is family and friends... I wish all my family and friends a very good new year. A year full of appreciating what we have.. and not worrying about what we do not have.. In closing, Happy New Year to my family.. and to my friends.. I wish us all good times and laughter.

Unknown said...

Gini - we share many of the same values and I love that I have become addicted to your Blog.
Well said - from beginning to end, could have written it myself - been trying to, in fact.
Happy New Year.

LaAna said...

I like you Gini! I only wish we would have had more time to get to know each other better, cause I like the way you think! Hope you have the best New Year celebration and that 2009 brings even more laughs and living.

Chris said...

Good post, Gin. Happy New Year Everyone!

Jerolyn said...

Just now reading this post...Wow thanks, I feel the same way. Happy New Year!